Ten Beautiful Words - The Best New-Parent Advice Ever

Are you even a new parent if you haven't received your fair share of "helpful" parenting advice? I challenge you to find a parent who hasn't received at least one piece of unsolicited advice. Over my short 3 year parenting journey, I've been blessed/cursed with a lot. Hell, I've already crossed over, and started giving back out this unsolicited advice! But I like to think that the advice I give is only the best... The creme de la creme of parenting advice.

Don't get me wrong, there is the rare occasion, where the advice you are given is actually useful. And anyone on the receiving end of my advice will know that well! Of course, helpful advice is great, you know the sort of advice that would change your life. Advice that you would happily pass on to another mum with no hesitation. For example, being told to use Metanium nappy cream for nappy rashes. That was mind blowing. Haven't tried it? Try it now. Cian had the worst nappy rash - his poor butt was covered in blisters. It was heart wrenching. But, I used that stuff on him and two days later, I SWEAR TWO DAYS, and that rash had completely vanished. 

So it is this life changing level of advice I want to pass on to you. The advice I received actually made my life so much better and at least 33% more stress free. I've obviously plucked that percentage out of thin air. How do you even quantify that? I'm sure people in adverts just make stuff up like that all the time.

Now I know I have built this up a little. Or a lot. So let me bring your expectations right back down to Earth. The advice I am about to share with you, is by no means revolutionary. In fact, it is pretty simple. And I'm sure at least 60% of people reading this (again I have no rational reason for this figure) will have heard this before. Drum roll please...

"There is never a right time to have a baby". 

Pretty simple right? I hope you don't hit X on your browser page right now. Hear me out. Let me talk it through. I will start by giving this advice some much needed context. When I received this advice, I had just found out I was expecting Cian. And like most good things in my life, he was a complete surprise. When I found out I was pregnant, I was 25, living with my now hubby, who was 24, in Wales. No, we're not from Wales. That's another story (see my about me page). We were both just starting out our working lives and neither of us really had started the whole career climbing thing people talk about. 

So when those two lines showed up on that pregnancy test, and the three tests after that, there were two thoughts that circled in my mind. MONEY and MY PARENTS. Did we have enough money to afford a child? How much do they even cost? Don't google that stuff. Google will freak you out faster than a spider landing on your face. To be honest though, the bigger concern was, what will my parents think? My parents are relatively traditional. Like a lot of my friend's parents, they come from the world of getting married before having children. I couldn't imagine how disappointed they were going to be.

Now, in that moment, I was freaked out. I thought this was not a picture perfect situation to bring a baby into. But I knew it was a damn site better than it could have been. Jack and I loved each other, and we had always seen children in our future. It was just the financial implications. And the whole out of wedlock thing! 

So, in my panic, I messaged my two best friends. First of all, I wanted confirmation I had interpreted the pregnancy tests correctly. So of course, I took pictures and sent them to them. I think that's how they found out I was pregnant. I'm not sure I even preempted the pictures with any chat. 

Anyway, after they confirmed that the tests were showing positive (sometimes it's hard to tell when it's a faint line!) we arranged to meet for coffee (decaf obviously!) the next day before work. But I had that whole evening to get through first. A whole evening of Jack being even more silent than normal (I'm the talker if you hadn't already guessed). A whole evening of wondering how badly my parents were going to react.

The next day, I met my best friends and started to pour out all my fears, my concerns to them.  They were exactly what I needed. And just when I thought they couldn't get any more reassuring. One of my friends said something. Ten beautiful words that every pregnant person needs to hear. 'There is never a right time to have a baby.' And let's face it, for 99.99% of women, that is true. There isn't. 

You could always be more advanced in your career, or have more money in your bank account, or be more settled as a couple. The list goes on. I personally think that regardless of whether you have planned your pregnancy, or you are having a little surprise like us, you will always have these thoughts. You will always need to hear these ten magic words. 

So, to that 33% of people reading this. You're welcome. Your life is better having read this post. I have reassured you. Let me know, are you one of the 33%? And, what is the best piece of parenting advice you've ever heard?